


Obsession

by Colamiilk



Category: Soul Eater
Genre: Bipolar Disorder, Dependency?, Drabble, Giriko having friends? what, I don't think he'd be friends with academy members but, I'm not sure if thats what this is called, IPSRT bipolar, M/M, Someone hug Justin and get him better medicine, Those rly problematic symptoms, for this its necessary so shh, old draft revamped, vent - Freeform, warm up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-17
Updated: 2020-11-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:47:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,733
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27603718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Colamiilk/pseuds/Colamiilk
Summary: Justin couldn’t help but be proud of that, to hum in self contentment and pride that he was the one Giriko liked and didn’t avoid, that he was the person who got his attention and got to be close. The only person.Until he wasn’t.
Relationships: Giriko/Justin Law
Kudos: 12





	Obsession

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this back in the autumn of 2019 but its applicable again so I finished it

Giriko hated  _ everyone _ . He was such a rotten and hateful person that everyone at the academy avoided him like the plague, and the man liked it that way. He didn’t want to be associated with anyone here, he didn’t want to play nice with the people he so hated. He was only here for Justin. That was the only reason he put up with this. Justin couldn’t help but be proud of that, to hum in self contentment and pride that  _ he _ was the one Giriko liked and didn’t avoid, that  _ he _ was the person who got his attention and got to be close. The only person. 

Until he wasn’t.

Justin always scolded Giriko for being so unfriendly, for being so rude and scaring everyone away. He always spoke about how he just wanted Giriko to be happy, to make friends and find his place within the academy. He wanted what was best for Giriko, he wanted the enchanter to flourish, even in this less than ideal situation…. But then he did. He started to finally open up in gritty, slow, annoyed speech that turned softer and more casual with everyday. He managed to get on somewhat good terms with Stein and found that his horrible sarcastic attitude matched well with Azusa’s. Justin was… happy for him… glad he was finding his place… but he also couldn’t stop the livid hateful angry voice inside of him that was screaming  _ ‘mine’ _ .

He was honestly shocked by it, Justin had never really thought of himself as a possessive person, but he was coming to the rapid conclusion that apparently he really really was. The rare times he got Giriko to hold his hand while they were walking his grip tightened horribly whenever someone else tried to get the enchanter’s attention. Making sure that they wouldn’t be seperated, that Giriko wouldn’t forget that he was giving  _ Justin  _ attention right now, not whoever that was. It was a reflexive movement on his part, one that made him flush ever so slightly in shame when Giriko looked at him in confusion. He was embarrassed, but he also never let go. 

Most surprising out of all of this was that Giriko never called him out on it, never called him a brat despite the fact that he was most certainly acting like one. It was odd, especially considering Giriko called him a brat for the stupidest shit sometimes, like eating the last chip or something equally dumb. So for him to be letting actual, real bratty behavior slide like this… it made Justin more than just a little nervous. 

All of this was making him nervous. Giriko liked  _ him, what _ was he doing liking other people? Was he bored of Justin? Was Justin not giving him enough? Tears pricked at his eyes ever so slightly and his stomach churned and made him slump over to try and alleviate the pain. He was being ridiculous, he knew he was being ridiculous and he should be elated that Giriko was finding other people to play with. The tears got heavier. He didn’t want Giriko playing with anyone but him. He wanted to be Giriko’s favorite, he wanted Giriko paying attention to him. 

Which was why it was amazing he found the strength in himself to stand up one day when Stein had sat down with them, and excused himself to go do his work somewhere  _ quiet,  _ somewhere Giriko wouldn’t keep trying to steal his pen just for the sake of pissing him off. That was what he said anyway. The real reason wasn’t that he wanted to work, but that he didn’t want to seethe in the corner as they talked, he didn’t want to scare everyone off from Giriko just as the enchanter was starting to open up. He was doing the right thing, leaving and letting them do whatever, but his stomach felt horribly heavy and his legs wobbled as he climbed the stairs to the upper levels. 

His mind was racing with jealous thoughts, of someone else getting positive attention from Giriko, of someone else making the enchanter smile and laugh, of someone else doing what Justin did only probably even better. He felt sick, he seriously felt like he was going to throw up right here, right on his feet as he finally managed to close the library doors behind him. He was panting, sweating with a throbbing headache. He had always known that he had problems with feeling inadequate before, but that was about work, not how he was socially. He knew his social abilities weren’t great, it had never bothered him like this before. He had never felt his heart throb over something so insignificant before. 

But he had also never been in love before. Especially not with someone who loved him back, or at least… who he thought loved him back. 

Curling up at one of the study desks Justin found himself desperate to have never even met Giriko, to be all alone again so he wouldn’t have to deal with this pain. He knew he was being ridiculous and weird and awful but his mind wouldn’t leave him alone, wouldn’t stop this from hurting so unbearably bad. 

He wanted Giriko’s attention, he’d do anything for it but at the same time he was far better than that and if Giriko wanted to move on then  _ fine _ . Justin wouldn’t grovel or do anything as pitiful as that. He hated himself for even  _ considering  _ putting work in for someone who wasn’t going to give him anything in return, he… he… why was he even thinking so far into this? There was no way Giriko was doing anything but living his life blissfully unaware of the fact Justin wanted to throw something he was so upset about this trivial bullshit.

There were more important problems for him to deal with, why was he so torn up about this? Why did he care? 

“What the fuck are you doing in here?” Justin hadn’t heard Giriko come in despite the fact that there was no way the man had made a quiet entry. Still, he didn’t spring to attention with Giriko’s angry demand, he only answered with a weird pained groan and didn't even bother to raise his head out of his hands. He was  _ far  _ too lost in everything to consider what was happening outside of his own mind. 

Giriko wasn’t too happy with that, upset he didn’t care enough to try and justify himself for bolting. Justin felt himself get rudely yanked up by the collar of his vestments and held up and outwards so he’d dangle awkwardly, forcing him to stop hiding in his hands and face Giriko. The eye contact they were making wasn’t great, Giriko looked pissed off beyond all reason and Justin’s gaze was so apathetic and tired that it was just obvious this wasn’t going to end well for either of them.

“Why the fuck did you just leave?” Giriko shook him by the collar like he was punishing a bad cat, probably trying to hammer his point in with the rough movement, Justin only stared down at him with dead tired eyes. He really didn’t have the energy to deal with this, not after all the mental torment he was just going through. Giriko shook him again, and his gaze finally started to show the beginnings of anger.

“Put me down.” From the way Giriko reacted it seemed like he was relieved that Justin had responded at all, but he still didn’t let go, and his glare still didn’t waver. It was clear Justin was going to have to fight his way out of this or relent and answer. He weighed his options, and settled on just answering so he could scare Giriko off with how much of a bad person he was and go home and sleep.

“I didn’t want to watch you give someone else attention.” It was so honest it burnt Justin’s tongue, something he always wanted to say but never let pass his lips until now. An intrusive thought that was never meant to touch the air but he had finally relented to. It wasn’t even  _ him _ saying those words, he wasn’t that voice inside his head but no one else would ever believe that.

“You’re such a fucking brat.” Justin had been expecting to hear that, because it was only right, but it still burnt and made him hiss. Giriko only closed his eyes and sighed out long and disappointed. Justin felt his heart fall all the way to hell when the enchanter set him gently back down on his feet, breaking their contact. It took everything in his power to not grab onto Giriko with a death grip, to not lock them together and make sure the other couldn’t leave.

“Would you really rather sit alone and be annoying and pouty about it than be with me? I don’t just fucking forget you're there, not everyone is like you with your laser focus on just one person.” A slight annoyed red flush dusted the top of Justin’s cheeks as he was called out for his lack, or rather too intense of focus. 

“Here just fucking… hold my hand, you can squeeze it when you start to feel bad and I’ll squeeze back ok? I’m not forgetting about you.” Giriko’s face was the slightest bit red as he said it, as he held out his hand awkwardly for Justin to hold on. Justin stopped breathing, his face hardened into something on guard, something waiting for pain… this didn’t feel right, this couldn’t be right… 

Giriko got impatient with his lack of reaction and snapped up his hand on his own, squeezing Justin’s fingers so hard underneath his massive grip an awkward whine came out of Justin’s throat. It hurt, his fingers ached… but it felt good. In all honesty Justin wanted more pain here, to have his entire body squeezed into a single goddamn atom so he could be held entirely by Giriko… but this would have to be good enough. 

Twitching his fingers to hold Giriko’s hand back he watched the enchanter relax the slightest bit, relieved Justin wasn’t mad or freaking out anymore… Justin found himself relax too, calmed by Giriko’s calm, following the lead desperately because he needed someone to pull him out of this mood. 

Giriko was always amazing at that.

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't been feeling well enough to write my normal author notes but thank you to everyone who still interacts with kudos or comments <3 I promise I'll do something better & more canon soon


End file.
